The Scrapfreak is Back

Well, today was a milestone for Tamara. It was her first full day of scrapbooking in a long, long time. A friend from Scrapfreak came down from Hamburg (to visit family in the area). The friend snuck away from family activities for the day and she and Tamara spent the day scrapbooking. They took over the Dachgeschoß and seemed to be having a good time.

I can't really tell because scrapbooking is so complicated, and I realized again today that I am mostly confused when they talk about their activities. There are lots of tools, scraps of papers, competitions, acronyms, etc. I often just have to nod and pretend I understand what she's talking about when she tells me something. But I love the end product. Very nice photo albums with cute pictures of our kids.

I can only compare the complexity to something like replacing the head gasket on a '64 Mustang convertible and trying to tell Tamara about it. She just wouldn't get it, and that's O.K., because she would enjoy the end product - cruising down the highway in a cool looking convertible. O.K., I actually think Tamara would hate having a '64 Mustang convertible, but you get the point.

My main job is to ask - when can me and the kids come home. I did with the 4 oldest children and got lucky on Ian taking a long afternoon nap. I was happy for Tamara.

German Beer Legend

I'm not a beer drinker, and don't even drink alcohol, but this german beer legend I heard today was pretty funny.

You must first know some background. In Köln (Cologne) the beer of choice is Kölsch. In Düsseldorf the beer of choice is Alt. Cologne and Düsseldorf lie on the Rhine and are both impressive cities. Cologne has the great cathedral (Kölner Dom), 2 TV stations, an arch Bishop, and is Germany's 4th largest city with almost 1 million inhabitants. Düsseldorf has 8 bridges in one of the shortest spans in the world, the TV Tower right on the Rhine, the Altstadt, is known in the fashion world, and is the capital of North Rhine-Westfalia. Düsseldorf is about 20 km down river from Cologne.

Cologne and Düsseldorf have a great rivalry. I would compare it to a Yankees vs. Red Sox, New York vs. Boston level of rivalry. In Düsseldorf I often hear people complain about those from Cologne. Everything from Düsseldorf is better than anything from Cologne because, well, it's from Cologne. This naturally carries over to the beer: Kölsch vs. Alt.

Now to the story. This is a pro-Kölsch story, but as an outsider I just enjoy watching the rivalry and have not taken sides, yet. Besides I only work in Düsseldorf. I live in Ratingen.

German Beer Legend
Kölsch vs. Alt
What's wrong with the Alt beer in Düsseldorf. Well, as the story goes, the good old boys in Cologne drink their Kölsch and then urinate into the Rhine. That Kölsch enhanced Rhine river water naturally flows down to Düsseldorf. And where do the Düsseldorf Breweries pull their water for making their Düsseldorf Alt beer. Naturally from the "leftover" Kölsch beer Rhine water.

Habits from Home and Abroad

As I was driving home tonight it was a bit foggy. Off in the distance I could see a dark car parking on the other side of the street. The car parked suddenly and turned off its lights. I immediately pulled my foot off of the gas and checked my speed limit. I had a automatic response. I thought the car was a cop car pulling over to set up a speed trap. I would categorize this as a totally American response. In Germany the speed traps are done during the day with cameras and several police officers waving down cars who were speeding.

When I got home I got settled, got a bite to eat and then went to the restroom. I went to the door, turned on the light, opened the door, and went into the restroom. This I would categorize as a totally German response. Light switches are commonly on the wall outside of a room. I can't tell you how often, since being here Germany, I have walked into a room and searched in vain in the dark for the light switch. Yes, I have even done this in our very own house. So, it was nice feeling to remember that the light switch goes first.

Thought it strange how habit plays such a vital roll in our daily lives and actions. And to see how ingrained some habits have become for me and how long it takes me to learn a new habit

Day 2

Well, now I am on my 2nd day of working as Mr. Mom. All the joys are gone, the back pain has set in, my diet is on the fritz, and I need a vacation. I know what all the real moms out there are saying - we told you so.

In reality it was another rewarding day with the kids. There were a few logistics challenges, and timing issues at the end of the day, but all in all, it was another great day with the kids. I'm thinking we should plan a fun outing for Tamara during the week another time so she can really de-stress.

Tamara is now home this evening. The bladder infection did not worsen and she improved enough to be released. The kids were happy to see her. Ian smiled several huge smiles despite aquiring Emma's croup and bronchitis today, and Emma talked Tamara's ear off on the way home.

That was a good end to the day. Emma was the saddest of all the kids with mom gone and her being sick. She cried first thing this morning for mommy. We were late getting ready for school again, but the kids did another great job getting ready for school and making their snacks. I helped out a little bit, but not as much as mom and they didn't even complain today. I think Tamara puts a little too much on her shoulders when it comes to getting the kids ready. I think the kids could do more and take some of the stress off of her.

We then read the scriptures during breakfast. Reading scriptures is something we talk about doing, but rarely get to. This morning was one of those mornings that make it worth it. The spirit was very strong. Because we were short on time, I just read were the book happened to be open. We read about Abish in the Book of Alma a womam who acted valiantly in a pressure situation and helped save peoples lives and bring others to Christ. The kids were excited about the passage it brought me some inner peace.

Then the big kids were off to school (hair partially brushed) and I was with Emma and Ian. Man those two are hilarious together. They are seriously like an old married couple. Ian toddling around and then falling, Emma helping him up and constantly telling him what to do. This morning she was feeding him grapes, just one at a time of course, and Ian couldn't have been happier. They have a great spirit of love about them and have been a huge blessing in our lives.

Yesterday I canceled the babysitter for this morning. I decided not to go to work for a 1/2 day because Emma was still feeling sick yesterday afternoon. That was a good decision. I called into my daily 10 a.m. conference call and took care of few things using email, called my team and was done. I used Skype for the conference call it cost about .50 €. The babysitter would have cost up to 50 € (10 € an hour for the 2 kiddos) and the babies slept for 2.5 - 3 hours (much better for them than playing at someones house for three hours. That was an effective use of time and resources. I was thinking I could do this everyday. Hang out with the kids until 9:30 and then hop on a conference call.

Ian and Emma slept very well, but when Ian woke up I could tell he had the bronchitis and croup that Emma has had. I was bummed for him. As stated above, the rest of the day was fairly normal. We had a few logistics issue picking up Tamara because the big kids had an activity at church. But we got her home around 6:00 p.m. and I'll be back at work tomorrow. I guess that means our lives are back to "normal". That is good news. It is sure nice to have Tamara back.

Mr. Mom

Well, today is a like a dream come true. I was always a huge fan of the movie Mr. Mom and today I got to live the out the film.

As stated in the gory details post I got home from checking Tamara into the hospital, and relieved our friends around 1:00 a.m. Monday morning (late Sunday night).

My fun Mr. Mom day started at shortly after 5:00 a.m. Emma woke up and her sister Hannah brought Emma upstairs to me. Emma is still sick and I could tell she was feeling pretty horrible. At around 5:45 a.m. she threw up. Gratefully she didn't have much in her tummy. I cleaned her up and got her settled again. I then emailed my work so that folks knew I would not be in the office, I read a bit and then started getting the kids up for school just after 7:00 a.m. It was later than I should have started, but the kids got up pretty quick once they knew mom wasn't there to help.

The big kids handled getting ready for school without mom pretty well except for one thing. They had to make their lunch on their own and were in shock and disbelief. One German cultural note, the school lunch is actually brunch or what the German grade school (Grundschule) calls breakfast - (Frühstück). The kids make small lunches all the time when I am around, but they claim that it is 100 times better when mom makes the lunch for them.

Hannah was coughing and I had a doctor's appointment for Ian (immunizations) and Emma (follow-up for her croup and bronchitis). So I kept Hannah home from school and took her with me to the doctor. She was a huge help with Emma and Ian throughout the morning. Emma's bronchial problems had disipated, Ian didn't cry too much after his immunization shot. He only had one and had recently been getting 3 and 4 shots per visit. So, I think he was like - that's all, and just stopped crying.

With Hannah, I saw a miracle. First off, she was not sick with bronchitis like emma and just had a case of croup (which is bad, but better than bronchitis and croup). Second, I'm not sure what it is about Hannah's German experience that has changed her so, but I am just filled with awe and wonder whenever I see the change manifest itself. This was Hannah's first visit to the doctors here in Germany and so they wanted to weigh her and measure her height (standard stuff). In America she would have cried and even screamed and kicked and pulled and maybe gotten on the scale with mom or me. Here in Germany she jumped right on and then let the nurse measure her height.

You might think it is her growth in age, but I believe it is more, as the change for Hannah started shortly after we arrived in Germany. In America she went two months in Kindergarden without speaking to another child, or playing on the playground. Like I said, she fought tooth and nail at doctor's offices and other places.

I'll recount todays episode as closely as I can recall and translate. The nurse introduced herself to all of the children by playfully trying to figure out which names belonged to which kid. She then said, wow those are some nice dress boots you are wearing Hannah (they are 2 days old by the way and Hannah was wearing a dress to be able to wear the new dress boots). Then she said, you've never been here before Hannah, so we want to weigh you and see how tall you are, so we know these things about you. Take off your jacket and those nice boots and jump on the scale.

At this point I was waiting for a scream, a cower, a flinch, or a something from Hannah. Instead, she took off her jacket and boots and jumped onto the scale. I stayed quiet.

The nurse called out the weight (something in kilos, which I can't recall now) and was excited about it. She then said the following about the height measurement. O.K., now you need to stand against this wall, right where the tree is. That's right, feet all the way against the wall. And make your head tall and straight. That's good. Alrighty Hannah, you are 116 centimeters tall (at least I think it was 116 centimeters).

Regarding my 1st Mr. Mom day, I was kind of keeping score in my head throughout the day. You know, how would a mom have handled the various situations I encountered throughout the day. I think I ended up at about a C+, maybe a B- (if I get extra credit for the two trips to see mom in the hospital). Not bad, for a first day, but definitely should have written down such facts. Tamara knows the weight, time of birth, length, names of various nurses in the delivery room, what I ate for lunch that day, etc., about all of our children's births. I can't remember their names from day to day. Would definitely need a notebook for day two or the next doctor's visit. Tamara also knows such facts about other events in the children's lives, so I've got room for improvement and that's not bad.

By the way, I have watched our children without Tamara before. Just never on a weekday, or only very rarely on a weekday, so this was a new and exciting experience for me. I had a lot of fun.

Well, back to Hannah. Then the doctor came in, also introduced herself to all the children, and then asked to listen to Hannah's chest. Lift up your shirt, all the way up, that's good, very nice. I again waited for Hannah to cower, squirm, jump back, cry, etc. Nothing. She just lifted up her shirt and let the doctor do listen to Hannah breath. I was very amazed.

I do think it is partially a German thing for Hannah, that has transformed her, or allowed her to transform. I think the German's handle pressure situations very well and maintain a calm and tranquility when times are tough that I did not always experience from Americans (including myself). Having a child say no I don't want to get on the scale, could cause stress, and so the German nurse was very excited for Hannah. I have sensed the stress from nurses in America when Hannah did not want to participate. The Germans seem to say, kids generally don't want to do this, so I have to make them feel at ease and valuable (they speak more directly with the child than with the parent I think), and then ask directly for what I need from the child.

Over the last year I have watched the Germans in situations in business and in conducting church meetings since being back and been amazed, time and time again, with their calmness and sense of purpose in times of nervousness and potential stress. Often this calmness and even distance from emotion is perceived negatively by Americans. But it has impressed me. It is one characteristic that I am trying to understand and model as I believe it will benefit me. You can sense that I don't fully understand it, as I have difficulty describing it.

Wow, do moms have a lot to write about. I'm only at about 10:00 a.m. and haven't written about our visit to Tamara in the hospital (with 3 kids), how Emma wanted mommy to come home and cried as we left the hospital, our trip to Aldi, the kids coming home, our 2nd visit to Tamara in the hospital (this time with all 5 kids and a toothbrush for Tamara), how Emma again wanted mommy to come home and cried as we left the hospital, and of course dinner, and bedtime.

I do have to share one thing about bedtime. That is, what Spencer told me when I asked him to put on pajamas. Spencer often wears clothes to bed. Usually the clothes he will wear the next day, so he just has to wake up, and walk out the door. But the clothes he was wearing were so soiled and dirty that I couldn't help but ask about possible options for bed and subsequently for the next school day.

Spencer responded by saying, these are my only long pants and so I have no choice but to wear them to bed, and then tomorrow to school.

I found some long pants and shirts in his winter clothes bucket upstairs. I hope they fit.